The Secret to Happiness

I was listening to the radio yesterday and the hosts were talking about a study on happiness. This study said that the happiest people were on average 74 yrs old. Then, throughout the hour they had people who considered themselves happy call and talk about what their secret was. How lucky for those of us who make it to age 74. I am not there and may never be, but I imagine at that point in your life you cannot avoid thinking about death. And thinking about death brings a clarity about happiness unlike anything else.

Thinking about my own happiness, I started to look back over the last few years and really see how things have changed. It is said that happiness comes from within, and I have given many talks on this topic. It actually was great to see that I can honestly say that I am happy. Maybe peaceful is an even better description. Things outside have not really changed. Although, I am married now and have a 1 year old son. The day to day things like money, time, traffic, etc that used to be "problems" in my life have not gone away. It is how I see them that is different.

One of the greatest changes in how I see my world comes from thinking about Death. Not as a morbid thing but as an actual fact. Many of us do not like to talk about this. Death is certain. Not thinking about it does not make it go away. Then, when someone in our life dies we are shocked and cannot believe that this has happened. If we are being honest, what did we really expect? Reminding ourselves that death is certain keeps us from wasting our time being upset with others about meaningless things. Thinking about death is not depressing. It is what brings us our own happiness. Waking in the morning as if each day could be your last keeps us really clear about what matters. We become kinder, more compassionate, patient, and generous.

Death can come at any time. We have no idea when it will happen. We tend to think that we have a lot of time left. But, as Lama Marut likes to point out, there is no average lifespan for any individual. This kind of thought process gets us moving now. There is no waiting to call our friends, volunteer for the needy, or start that project we always wanted to do. The time is now. Every moment counts because today really could be your last. You will never let your loved ones leave with you being angry, your relationships will be strong, and you will not waste your time irritated at your coworker for being so irritating.

Every moment you have left is a miracle. Much unhappiness comes from not appreciating what we have and in some way thinking it will last forever. Live every moment as if it were your last and you will be happy. This is the secret.